Why do we use REWARDS and INCENTIVES?

To teach kids that HARD WORK PAYS OFF!

Some parents ask: "Why should I use incentives? Isn't that just teaching kids to be greedy?"

NO! Using Incentives teaches kids that HARD WORK PAYS OFF!

My THANK, DON'T SPANK!  method works SO well...

Kids finally SEE HOW it is more rewarding to do the right things instead of only getting attention when they are misbehaving.

  • Getting attention for being GOOD builds in your child the satisfaction of being an ACHIEVER; a person who is part of the solution, not the problem.
  • It establishes good habits of CREATIVITY, SELF CONTROL and GOAL SETTING.
  • You will notice the difference in your childs' attitude IMMEDIATELY!
  • If YOU are CONSISTENT, they will see that being good is SO much MORE FUN than being punished for misbehaving!

So - HOW Do I USE the Rewards Chart?

NOTE: Always Remember to think things out and PLAN AHEAD! Explain the new program clearly to your kids before you do it. REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE THE LEADER! BE calm. Be confident. YOU are the boss, not them. Read more ideas for planning ahead, here.

REWARDS: Decide on a treat they will only get at the end of the week: (something simple and inexpensive. For instance: ice cream, candy bar, a trip to the 99 cents store where they can pick out one item. There are MANY rewards that are not FOOD*, toys or money, such as: Choosing a special parent approved video; getting to play a video game for a limited time (on a parent approved game, of course!); a visit to the park: the library; visit to a free museum; visiting grandparents if they are not too far away, having a special book read to them, getting to go swimming at the YMCA, having a friend over for a movie and popcorn, a special craft project, gardening or other fun activity to do with you. The list can go on and on, limited only by your imagination!

All week long, make sure to deny them that special treat and remind them that they will get it at the end of the week after they have earned their stickers or 'good marks'. At the end of the week, give them the treat you have agreed on. (We used Saturday as our REWARD DAY - and reserved Sunday as a day of rest and to prepare for school the next day - you will figure out what will work best for your schedule.)

*Improving the diet can help behavior, too. Many children become hyperactive just from getting too much sugar and overly processed foods. Some kids cannot have them EVER - check with your physician. When mine were little they would become hyper if I would let them eat candy, soda, dessert, or artificial colors, so I would limit those treats to the 'reward day', and only if their chart was completed by Friday. (I could tolerate a barrel of monkeys once a week but not EVERY day!)

Make sure to explain what you are doing beforehand, and you will both enjoy it!

READ MORE about consequenses for POOR behavior here

TAMMY asked an important question about REWARDS here: "Do they get a reward at the end of every week regardless? Or if they don't so something one day does that mean they don't get a reward at all?" Read more...

You can Modify the chart to specify CHORES instead of BEHAVIORS (See this page link)

If your little one is too little to understand a chart approach, Make an "I CAN" Book! Here's HOW! Great for infants and kids under 2!

How can you Motivate people?  Find out HERE!
It takes a little more time in the beginning but when you can learn how, it reaps GREAT rewards - for YOU, and your children, TOO!

Click on the chart Below to get your FREE charts:

behavior chart

And as always, EMAIL me if you have any problems or suggestions, OK?

 "Teaching children the important things, one kid at a time..." Ruth Elliott